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Wednesday, 18 November 2009

Monday, 16 November 2009

  • Her View (3)

    so, this is a continuation of my later blogs 'And you would...' & 'You chose...' so, if you don't understand what any of this means and are interested, you might want to take a step back ward and read the first two blogs, kay. Okay...

    Her View of The Scenario:

    A week passes by and you haven't needed your friends. A week, that's about to end. You kneel on the floor to pull out your friends but come up empty when your reach. Hm... you think, puzzled as to why there not in your hands. Annoyed, you pull out the bag that you've been keeping them in, its nearly empty. Only crumples of cigarette tobacco remains. That bag hadn't been used by you in a very long time but you always kept the bad things in there. You realize that that's where your suicide note from a month ago was hidden. You had your reasons of not throwing it away and you had your reasons for creating it. But now, now you had your reasons to flip over why it was not in the black bag, along with your razors! You hadn't gone looking for them in a long time time and you try to recall the last time you had. But you know that they' were placed in the bag, no where else. You can't agree with your mind though so you go through your many hiding spots. It doesn't show up, needless to say. She found them. You already have come to that conclusion, so fast and yet so assure. She prolly found them along time ago, you figure, and she didn't even talk to you this time. Your upset that she has them and that its stopping you from SI but it slowly creeps onto you the hurt of no one even talking to you about your suicidal thoughts and actions. Them talking to you has never gone over smoothly but talking atleast show'd that somehow they cared, they didn't talk to you this time, now you wonder if it would of been better off with you gone.

Sunday, 15 November 2009

  • And you would...

    Okay, here's a scenerio, u tell me how you would react, kay.

    Scenerio:
    Your in your daughters room one day. She's off to school and your doing your snooping around. You tell yourself, you've got the right to and it's okay. Well, you've done snoop routines since tleast 6th grade so you know what your doing. Read a couple notes, a couple pages from her diary, look at anything that might be suspicios then leave. You've found things and confiscated them before, it's routine. Once you'd found several dark and depressing poems (confiscated) and once read a note about smoking pot on Halloween (not confiscated nbut actions were stopped w/o talking to the daughter). Well, today was just a random snoop, shed been good lately and that was enough to make you suspicios. You read a couple notes, nothing interesting. But then, you looked under the bed, jackpot! From her purse, you pull out a string of razors, all connected with a bloody purple piece of yawn. Connected to that, was a heavily smudged note. With struggle, you read enough, to notice it's a suicide note.



    Now, in the comment box, finish the scenerio. How do you react?
  • TWLOHA

    I know, I missed TWLOHA day but I still wanna write something with it in mind. Okay, so in a recent survey, it was discovered that 43% of highschool student have self injured themselves more than once in the last month. So, that almost 50% of highschoolers. Now, apply that to your life: think about your closest friends or family. Say you are thinking about ten of your friends, most likely, atleast 4 of them have ezpiremented with SI. So, it really does affect you, assuming you have a heart that is. Ok, your not in high school? Well, it doesn't just applyto highschoolers. Many of the younger kids also do this, in fact, most people start around 8th grade. But your older that that? It can still affect you or your loved ones. Using SI to deal with battles in your life never fully leave you. Once you become a cutter, burner, or any of the various ways of seriously harming yourself you have changed how your brain works and that's something that you can't fully undo. Many people say, once a cutter always a cutter. So, TWLOHA day is a great day to just remember that this epedemic is going on. If your a SI there's help out there for you. There are many help lines designated to help, psychologists are always suggested, also, there are great web sites out there for your use. Recoveryourlife.com is a good one (I personally use it). But most importantly, remember your loved. Ok, that's my speel on that. Xoxo.bye.

Friday, 13 November 2009

  • My venture

    What a fuching reject of a day. Starts with me reminicing (never a good thing). Then I tell Amber about my suicide note. then I got a new razor, cut right in front of Amber (lame ass bitchy move). Then I had to get my mom to drive Kyle back from Lake Linden (this shitty town that out in nowhereville, known for partying and is completely out of the way of anything) smellin like beer and cigerettes. And it was late like 9ish and my mom was/is super pissed cuz she wanted to go to bed and she doesn't really know why Kyle was there. She said he'll have to make it up to her. And ofcourse I was I. Middle of a sleepover with Amber and she didn't want to go get my drunk(?) boyfriend where there wasn't any cell service. Also, we had to go searching for him because he wasn't where he said he'd be. Then when we got home he dared to call me and act like I had no right to be even a oil mad. I have no idea why he was in lakelinden. Ugh, Ambers pissed at me now cuz I'm talking well testing Kyle and she doesn't think I should be because she thinks I'm pissed. I'm not pissed. I have no right to be pissed. Obviously something happened and I got him out, okay no biggy. Well, I need to just sit in silence now. Byez.